I haven’t slept well at least the last two days. I simply can’t seem to relax and let god Morpheus take me. I don’t know why he might be upset with me. I don’t know what to do to please him and accept me…
The truth is I have many stuff in my mind at the moment. I feel pressured from all the things I have to do and failing to accomplish in the degree I’d want to. There is of course no one to blame but me. I have stuff at work, that are delayed and I’m struggling to finish. I have lots of studying to do and failing is not an option for me. I also have arranged running for Cancer Research the Sunday of the 17th October, the day after the final course, and I want to train for that as well. In the meantime I am applying for new jobs, trying to sort out my finances and go to the gym regularly with my personal trainer which leaves me in pain the next day(s).
Of course, a logic person would tell me to stop training and going to the gym, sort my priorities and stop worrying for things that are not mine to control.
I disagree… Running is something I love doing. I am not that great (yet) at it but I love how it helps clear my mind. I love that I am increasing my mileage, that I my average speed is also increasing and the feeling of accomplishment it is giving me.
I simply need to put myself together. Arrange a studying schedule that can be followed and accept the fact that some sacrifices (cinema, going out) need to be made in order to accomplish some of my goals…
Anyway, enough whining. I’ll be fine, I know it. I feel already just by writing these things down. A very strong shot of caffeine will make me so much happier now. Maybe some chocolate? And I’ll definitely find how to please Morpheus. Maybe a nice chamomile or warm milk tonight?