Tuesday, 2 March 2010

5 days to go…

In five days I’m running my half marathon and to be honest I’m quite excited about it. My race number is ‘11063’ (I think) and I’ve read that 15,000 people registered for the run. It will be so packed… I haven’t been very lucky weather wise or with my physical health for my training but I’m pretty sure I’ll be fine and I’ll manage to finish my 13.1 miles (even if it kills me). I just know that it will not be a fast race for me. I just hope I will not finish last. At least I managed to raise some money for ‘Cancer Research UK’.

On a very more serious and far more important issue ‘JJ’ told me that he loves me and I said the same to him. I really don’t want to brag about it and it even feels weird writing about it. We were lying on my bed, I just finished giving him a back massage and we were just there, sharing a comfortable silence. He then said that he loves me. I can’t describe how beautiful it made me feel.

I have in general an issue with expressing my feelings verbally and using the ‘L’ word even with friends or family. I don’t know if he realizes that (I hope he does) but I might have to explain it to him to avoid any misunderstandings. I replied that I’m falling in love with him as well but still I haven’t uttered these three words independently, on my own: ‘I <3 you’. I can almost feel all my female friends grinding their teeth and rolling their eyes. I don’t know if it’s a ‘man’ thing.

I can’t really put my finger on it. I fear that I might jinx the whole thing by provoking the fates admitting that I love him. I fear that the moment I tell him I love him he’ll turn into a frog or something, we’ll start having major fights and all hell will break lose. Like most humans out there I’ve been hurt in the past and I’m now trying to be cautious (excuses). That is why I’ve even started this post by talking about my run and not ‘JJ’. I just need my time… (I have to appreciate how patient he’s being with me)…

The Moirae

Anyway, the bottom line is that we’re in a very happy place at the moment, making short term plans on how to spend this summer together and where to travel. All these are so new to me. It’s really the first time I’ve been in a real relationship with a guy that has really good potential and not just ‘it’s complicated’. I haven’t even been away with a boyfriend (ever) on vacation. I’ve done all that with some girls I was dating in the past, but it’s not the same.

PS. Wozzel or Paige or anyone else that can help, if you’re reading this, can I ask you for a few ‘spicy’ things I can tell ‘JJ’ in Afrikaans to surprise him?


  1. darling

    after the initial infatuation of romance wears off... you know you are in love when you see that person from the inside, out... and no longer from the outside, in.

  2. I'm the same way -- I've been told "I love you" several times, but have never uttered those words in that order to someone.

    Good luck on the race! Hopefully you'll live up to your namesake's reputation. :-)

  3. I think the picture you chose sums it up well… hearing it made you melt, like you were almost liquid. Vulnerable, but could freeze if it were cold, and boil if it were hot.. just go with it, go where ever it takes you, and enjoy every minute of it. GOOD LUCK with your race!!! I’m sure you will do awesomely!

  4. watch out for the nipple burn! Good luck


  5. Ποτέ δεν έχω πεί σε φίλο 'I love you'. Να πω την αλήθεια δεν ξέρω τι σημαίνει. Καταλαβαίνω τι σημαίνει 'κάβλα' και τι σημαίνει ΄φιλία', αλλά 'αγάπη';;; Έγω χάνω, το παραδέχομαι.

  6. Is nipple burn to do with love or running?

  7. Nik, take your time. Enjoy his company. Keep on with the short-term plans - you'll see it'll lead you to the long ones.

    Like it was said, once you know him from the inside out, you'll see that, when you say "I <3 U" , you'll be truly feeling it.

    As you can see, you started the entry with the marathon theme, but all comments start with the "I <3 L" one ;)

    Time will tell you!

    p.s.: oh, and keep on smiling and keep on feeling like the luckiest guy alive because, at least, you have someone beside you! Someone who was strong enough and not afraid to say "I love you".

    p.s.2: I wish you the best of lucks in the marathon. You're running for a royal cause.

  8. @Suf_n_Steve that sounds lovely... We'll see when (and if) we get there...

    @Gauss_Jordan Thanks. I'll try. Winning the race though is something I can't see happening. I'll finish it though... :-)

    @Wozzel Thanks.

  9. @MadeInScotland I'll be prepared (this time). It's not a nice feeling. Thanks

    @Vilges_Suola Ποτέ δεν είναι αργά το να πεις 'I love you'. Νομίζω ότι είναι καλύτερα να το έχεις πει και να το μετανιώσεις παρά να μην το έχεις πει καθόλου...
    The comment about the nipples is about running (this time)...

    @Pedders Obrigado. You're right. I'm trying to enjoy and appreciate it as much as I can. Yes, only time will tell though...