I’ve kept the existence of this blog as a secret to most of my friends. It’s not like I have something to hide, it’s just too personal sometimes to share and to be honest it doesn’t concern them. I can count the number of my friends who knows about it with the fingers of my left hand (I use my right hand to count).
I told however ‘JJ’.
A couple of months ago I met a fellow blogger (I haven’t spoken to him in ages, I hope he’s on vacation somewhere nice or something) and I was supposed to meet another (which unfortunately I didn’t). During that period I was already dating ‘JJ’ for 6 months and I never mentioned the blog to him. Don’t ask me why. I do not know. It’s not like I posted something about him that I wanted to hide, or that I am not open to him about my past experiences.
So, at some point, I told him that I have a confession to make. His first reaction was to get really worried as he normally does but when I told him that I write a blog he was relieved but curious about it. He asked me why I write it. I told him that it’s an online journal where I chat and “meet” fellow bloggers. He had a list of questions to ask me like if it is anonymous, if I write about him, if I have too many followers, how long I’ve been doing it etc. I tried to answer to his questions honestly and I could see that he was relieved that the blog is anonymous without a million of followers!
The next step of conversation was about whether he should read it or not. I had decided to tell him about the blog but I hadn’t really decided about whether I should give to him the URL or not. I wanted to see his reaction first. I could see that he was very curious about it. There was that sparkle in his eyes that he gets when he wants to be mischievous. It would be like opening my drawers and going through my stuff to look for hidden ‘treasures’.
After debating about it with himself for a while he decided that this expression of my feelings should be private. He believed that if I knew that he might be reading, I would write about things differently, even unconsciously, ruining the whole experience. So, on his own, he told me that he doesn’t want to read my blog but he’s happy that I told him about it. Sometimes I can’t help but think how fortunate I am I found him. I really don’t know what other bloggers have done…